• is freaked out Donald Trump’s doctor reported he’d be the healthiest president…He meant President of The Rhode Island Gopher Association.
  • Friends forever. #nationaldogday https://t.co/DRswDt6WPh
  • is freaked out scientists have created an actual black hole in their lab…Whatever, my laundry room dryer does the same thing with the socks.
  • is freaked out Domino’s is starting Drone Delivery in New Zealand…unfortunately the drones are way stoned and looking for a really good tip.
  • is freaked out Tesla’s new car goes 0-60 in 2.5 seconds…which is awesome when I’m really hungry and need to get a pizza 10 seconds faster.